Brother to the Trees

I want to begin with a practice, “Presenting Your Ego to a Tree.” which I learned in Mexico in 1996. I was there for three weeks of workshops based on the book The Teachings of Don Carlos, Practical Applications of the Work of Carlos Castaneda. It doesn’t have to be called “Presenting Your Ego to a Tree.” The first time I performed it I happened to be in a thick forest on the side of the volcano Popocatépetl outside of Mexico City.  I have often shared this practice in other environments like Death Valley, where there are no trees. When there I speak about Presenting Your Ego to a Cactus or a Boulder.

This exercise can be fun as well as revealing. It begins by having the participants wander outside – individually — until they each find “a tree that speaks to them,” a tree they feel a connection to in some way. Over years leading vision quests and workshops, helping people learn to listen and hear nature speaking has always been part of the process

Once someone finds “their” tree, the person stands back a few feet from its trunk and proceeds—for at least five minutes—to “present his or her ego to the tree.” This must be done powerfully and energetically, and it should take the full five minutes, no matter how it feels. Once someone has presented his/her ego to the tree, the person stops, remains silent for 15–20 seconds, and then asks the tree, “Is there anything you’d like to say to me about all this?”

“Presenting your ego” — What does that mean? In simple terms, your ego is what you do to get attention from people. It’s your “shtick.” In one sense it’s the “face” we habitually show to the world, thinking it will get us a response we want. For example, one person’s shtick might be, “Look how smart and funny I am!” Perhaps he was good in school and learned to make everyone laugh so his classmates wouldn’t envy or resent him. And it worked so well that he’s continued it in some form to this day.

Another person’s ego or shtick might be letting everyone know how tough or competent or sensitive he or she is, but a shtick does not have to be positive. Some version of “let me tell you what a difficult life I’ve had” is used by many people today to gain sympathy, or avoid becoming responsible and making choices, etc. Whatever it is, once you recognize it you must speak aloud for at least five minutes, telling the tree what a tough life you’ve had… or how persevering, tough, smart, or funny you are. When finished, after a short period of silence, ask the tree to respond, to let you know what it thinks of all this.This exercise can be great fun as well as profound. In presenting one’s ego it can be helpful to “ham it up,” to exaggerate. The point is to not hold back, to put it all out there.

My first time doing this I was drawn to a large Engleman spruce that rose 150 feet into the sky. I was that person mentioned above whose shtick was “Look how smart and funny I am.” I took a breath stepped back and let it rip. I told the tree about being a math prodigy, skipping first grade, my SAT scores, and some of my best jokes. Just the act of presenting all that was illuminating; it must have been all of 10 or 15 seconds before I heard a voice say, “What a crock of shit!” as I displayed a personality I’d refined over decades to astound or impress anyone else who was around. Damn – another 4:45 to go!But I struggled through, keeping at it until it was finally over. I paused, waited for 20 or 30 seconds and said, “Is there anything you’d like to say about all that?” It didn’t take long for the words to come to me – “Do you think any of that will help when it’s time to die?”

Damn… obviously not… And just my luck to pick a tree that majored in philosophy! I stood silently, feeling like I was in shock. After a few moments the voice returned, saying, “I think of you as my little brother. So, to me you are the Son of the Mountains and a Brother to the Trees. When your time finally comes, remember that… and I assure you it will help.”

So, my friends, I am Sparrow Hart, Son of the mountains and Brother to the trees. I have never forgotten that. And it has helped me every day of my life.

Ho!